How to Fight Insecurity as a Mom

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Fighting negative thoughts as a homeschool mom

There is such a negative stigma regarding insecurity; it’s so bad that people are supposed to be mad and reject you because you don’t hold yourself so high. But how can anyone, when society is constantly waving ads or social media algorithms, show conventionally attractive, happy, and successful people? How to fight insecurity gives you tips because we understand that moms (homeschooling, work-at-home, career moms, or autism moms) all fight the same battles of never feeling enough.

You can’t help but compare yourself to the world and assume something must be wrong with you. While many people don’t like to admit it, insecurity is heavily tied to your mental health. This can potentially spiral into anxiety, depression, or even as far as eating disorders.

As a homeschooling mom, I have heard countless times, “why do you think you can give your child a decent education?” Are you really qualified to teach your own kids?” As a mom to an autistic child, I have heard, “you need to be doing…” and many times it is conflicting advice from one expert to the next. With society always telling us that our choices are wrong, it’s so important to fight off insecurity, and here are a few ways how.

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Treat yourself as you would treat your best friend

One of the hardest things for almost anyone is treating themselves as if they were their best friend. Self-love is so important, and while this may not fight off anxiety attacks, you’re at least helping yourself out and giving yourself a better state of mind.

As a Christian, I put God first, but it’s okay to prioritize your needs. In fact, this is highly encouraged. Accept yourself for who you are; there is nothing wrong with you. Whether you are autistic, have a disability, or anything else, nothing is wrong with you. Just accept and love yourself as you would anyone else. This is a vital part of self-care and self-love.  

Keep a spiritual journal or a feelings journal

This is often suggested for teenagers, but it can help anyone of any age. While a feelings journal won’t get you off the ground, it can teach you to separate your feelings from reality. It can also help you assign logical and rational explanations to uncomfortable emotions. You can write about the things you want or missing in your life, such as invisible braces, vacations, or what’s been happening to you.

I prefer a God journal where I record my thoughts and feelings about what I read in the Bible or what God is saying to me. Listening to the voice of the one who created me and hearing what He says about me is essential to feeling good about my choices. It also helps give me clarity when I am struggling with decisions.

Talk to a friend or loved one

After talking with God, there is nothing wrong with consulting trusted friends. I make sure to ask a friend who is on the same page as me regarding spiritual issues. I know that my friends seek God and will not give me advice that isn’t run from a Biblical viewpoint.

Having insecurities can affect your life in many ways. Your trust, your relationships, and your physical health can be affected. It’s essential to find a way to fight off your insecurities. The most crucial part of any battle is communication. Talking to a friend about your feelings can help you resolve your concerns and improve your relationship. However, you can only expect a solution to take time. Insecure people need a stable group of support to help them through.

Reach out to a mental health professional

Getting help from a mental health professional can be a great way to fight insecurity. It’s important to find a therapist who can work with you to explore your insecurities and develop coping mechanisms. Take advantage of getting a professional; they can do a lot of good.

Be aware that not all mental health care professionals seek God’s wisdom. If you want a Christian counselor contact your church or ask your trusted group of friends for recommendations.

Drop the self-judgment to fight insecurity

Often, our self-judgment is the result of negative beliefs about ourselves or negative voices from our childhood. Many times we listen to a parent or a pastor and determine “good” and “bad” and deem ourselves through those eyes. We judge things God does not judge. Does God care if you cut your hair? Does God deem pierced ears as unholy?

We may all know people who never watched movies, danced, or played cards because they were taught those were wrong. But we probably have our own rights and wrongs that are not wrong, but they were not preferred by the people raising us. Find out what God says by reading His word. Then you can begin to see what God says about you and what you believe from others.

Whether they are called low self-esteem, self-hatred, or self-attack, these beliefs are destructive to our happiness. To combat these beliefs, you can use a simple method to drop the self-judgment.

First, you should identify what you think you are lacking. This can include feelings of insecurity, a lack of confidence, or a lack of success. Then, you should write down these feelings and put them in a safe place. Secondly, you should consider how you respond to criticism from others. For example, if someone criticizes you, you might ask yourself, “How do I want to respond?” You can also practice being compassionate toward yourself. If you are criticizing yourself, take a moment to recognize that you are experiencing pain and offer compassion.

Validate feeling defensive

When dealing with defensiveness, you’ve got to be careful not to take it too far. It can lead to problems in the long term. As with any form of self-help, you need to be cautious in using it. It’s not just the people you’re dealing with. You also have to remember to validate your feelings. For instance, if you’re feeling defensive about something, it’s a good idea to ask yourself why you’re feeling that way or what the problem is. This can help you determine whether you’re irrational or not.

 

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