How to Have More Joy in Your Homeschool

It is possible to have joy in your homeschool experience, however, it is not easy. If you are not ready to put in the hard work to make your home and homeschool experience joyful, then stop reading RIGHT NOW!

Choosing Joy in Your Homeschool

Good! Everyone reading from here on out is ready to do the hard work to make your home joyful. This is not for the faint at heart. In fact, I know many attempt to choose the path of joy, but not many will succeed. You see, the key to success is you.

Now, you may try to argue that I am wrong, because, “You don’t know my kids,” or “You don’t know my situation.” You’re right, I may not know your situation or your kids, but I have my own set of situations and kids.

I have a son with autism, a husband who had a cardiac arrest 4 years ago who was the primary breadwinner, mounting bills, a 90 year old mother who requires trips to the doctor’s office and hair salon, a husband who works lots of hours, and an auto-immune disease that makes me beyond tired some days.

Additionally, at one point, I had a child in high school, middle school, elementary school, a toddler and a newborn, and a father on dialysis 3X a week. I was nursing a baby, watching my father slowly slip away, and making meals for my family and for him.

We All Have Valid Reasons to Not Choose Joy

However, if you let all the reasons why you can’t find joy to cloud your vision, you never will find joy. And I was not raised in a joyful home.

I was raised by a mom that really didn’t want children. She let me know on a regular basis that I was not wanted. But God graciously brought other people into my life that let me know that I was indeed wanted by him and others. My dad wanted me. My siblings wanted me. There were teachers, friends, and so many other people through the years that taught me where my identity comes from.

When I began to have children, I was parenting the way that I was raised. I tried hard to be different, and most the time succeeded, but there was one day that I said, “The change starts with me.”

I have been on a 25-year journey to being the best mom I can be. FYI: my oldest is 31. In my first year of homeschooling, I was demanding behaviors and attitudes from my children that I was not willing to have myself.

My house lacked joy. And while I have worked to look for the joy, I haven’t always been successful myself. Raising 5 children, homeschooling, taking care of the house, cooking meals, and working sometimes full-time, definitely puts a strain on a mom.

So how was I able to actually see the joy in my home? And how can you find joy in your homeschool? It started with me, and it can start with you. You have to make the biggest changes first before anyone else in your household does.

Tips to Find Joy in Your Homeschool

Some of these tips to rise above the chaos in your homeschool seem too easy, and yet other ones are hard – really hard. This training to Look for the Joy requires much discipline and a desire to want to change.

Start with God

Start each day with time with God. Maybe you are not used to spending time reading your Bible, but even if you don’t start there, wake up with a prayerful attitude.

Thank you, God, for my life today.

Write a List of 100 Things You are Grateful For

Make a list of 100 things you are grateful for. My mentor, Elayna at The Positive Mom, first plugged me into this. This list is easy to make and requires very little time to do. It is designed to write or type quickly. Make it today, print it out and keep it handy.

What One Thing Can You Choose to Be Thankful For?

Write down one thing that you are thankful for with your children. Maybe you have a child with special needs. Is there one quality that he/she has that brings you joy? Write that down.

Focus on One Quality

When you feel yourself getting upset with your situation or your children, stop what you are doing, and remind yourself of that one quality that brings you joy.

Put on Your Own Oxygen First

When traveling by plane, the flight attendants always give instructions that tell you if you are traveling with children, to put on your own oxygen first. This ensures that you are taken care of and then you can take care of your children. The same holds true in parenting/homeschooling. If you are worn out, run-down, and tired all the time, you are no good to anyone (and you will lack joy). Taking care of your needs is not selfish; it is healthy and important to discovering a joyful existence.

Reduce Clutter

Reduce the clutter in your life. I know this sounds so simple, but the act of decluttering automatically brings joy. I tried the Marie Kondo approach to decluttering, and while I am not a proponent, there are certain aspects of it that I enjoyed. Getting rid of things that don’t spark joy, certainly helps you begin to experience more joy.

Only Buy Things That Spark Joy

Only buy things that spark joy. Now before you say, “Toilet paper or dishwashing soap do not spark joy,” imagine your house with no toilet paper or dish soap. A clean house and something to wipe yourself with are definitely joy producers.

Give Generously

Joy is found when we are generous with other people.

Receive Freely

When you are so focused on yourself, that you prevent others from giving to you, you block blessings and joy in your life. By receiving freely, you open yourself up to immense joy.

Pray Before Saying Yes

As moms, we are so used to saying yes that we overload our schedules. When I 1) failed to consult God, and 2) overextend myself, I end up being mad at myself for saying yes to something I shouldn’t have. This always created anger within me and robbed me of joy.

Smile

It causes other people to smile and you both feel joy.

Eat Food and Drink Water

I know this sounds simple, but how many of you forget to eat and drink all day long, and then you become tired, hungry and dehydrated. And not joyful at all!

Stressful Situations Pass By

The thing you are stressing about right now – it most likely will pass and then there will be something else to stress out about, but many times you can’t do anything about it except worry. Worry never solves anything. Either make a plan to deal with the situation or let it go!

Keep a Journal

Write down all the things that stress you out. Refer back to it in 6 months. Most likely, the things that caused you to stress out 6 months ago are most likely gone, but if they aren’t, that may be a clear indication you cannot change your situation. If you can’t change things, you can still change you!

Listen to Joyful/Upbeat Music

Music has a very therapeutic effect. Sometimes I play worship music, or other times I play classical music. There are days that I play some Dean Martin because he was my dad’s favorite singer. And then some days I play good old fashioned rock n roll.

Drop Your Expectations

When we are raising children and homeschool, and we have high expectations of ourselves and our children, we have set ourselves up for failure. Negative self-talk does the same thing – phrases like I should have…, I meant to…, If I would have…, or Why didn’t I… all give you negative feelings.

Quit Taking Advice from the Wrong People

When homeschooling and looking for joy, this is one of the best pieces of advice I can give you. Because your best friend uses a certain teaching style or your favorite blogger recommends using a particular math curriculum, doesn’t mean it will work for you. Pave your own path that is right for you and your family. There are better ways of choosing a curriculum that suits you and your family.

Trust the Creator

While we doubt our ability to raise our children and often feel like we are failing, we know the One who never fails us. Trust God and walk closely with Him. The Holy Spirit will guide you in all things and bring you joy that is unsurpassable.

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