Homeschooling Questions Then and Now

As a homeschooler, I have been asked a lot of questions over the years, but I noticed the questions have changed the longer I homeschool. When I started homeschooling, the number one question I was asked was about socialization. I started to notice that the questions changed significantly about 10 years ago, and I thought, “It’s funny how I never get asked about socialization anymore.” At that point, I thought maybe it was because homeschooling has become more common, but talking to beginner homeschoolers I found that they were still getting asked the socialization question. So why and how have the homeschooling questions changed through the years?

WHY THE CHANGE IN QUESTIONS?

So why did the questions change? Did the questions change because people have seen through my family that homeschooling works? Or did the questions change because more and more people are now homeschooling? But new homeschoolers are being asked about socialization all the time. So what is the difference in questions, and why the difference? Now that I have graduated my first three children (ages 31, 29, 26), and they are productive members of society, it is hard to wonder whether it works or not.

QUESTIONS I USED TO GET ASKED:

Aren’t you worried you will ruin your children?

This was a confusing question because I never viewed my children as a cake mix or something that could be ruined. I viewed them as precious children to raise and guide into adulthood. While I used to get asked if I was worried I would ruin my children, I think it’s funny how I never get asked anymore.

I suppose homeschool families could ask public school families the same question? Aren’t you worried you will ruin your children by sending them to public school? Recent studies have shown that just a third of the students in public schools can read proficiently. However, a homeschool family is more likely to know if their child cannot read and get the required help before they graduate. There are stories all the time that suggest that public school children have been passed through without being able to read and the parents have never known.

How will you teach math or science?

I used to get asked about why I felt I could teach math, science, or some other subject. To which I confidently said, that math and science were my strong points. However, it’s funny that nobody ever says, “How will you teach them math?” anymore. 

In fact, homeschool families can ask the same questions to their public school counterparts. How will you teach them math or science if they fall behind? Homeschool parents can join co-ops, hire private tutors, or join online support groups to find people or programs with a particular subject. There is no end to the help available for homeschool families and because parents generally have their child’s best interest at heart, they will seek out the aid they need.

How will they be prepared for the real world?

When I used to get asked this question, I would respond, “The real world does not have a bell that rings every 45-60 minutes, and you get to change classrooms or teachers. The real world does not have you segregated by your peers, and those are the only people you see for the majority of the day. The real world is not 8-2:30. Having three adult children has helped deal with the questions about preparing them for the real world. It’s funny that I don’t hear “They won’t be prepared for the real world.” 

What about socialization?

When I used to get asked this question, I would tell people that there were plenty of ways to socialize, however, school is for education. We did sports, 4-H, church, visiting relatives, and more activities. However, socialization can occur at the grocery store, the fast-food restaurant, a park, and when the FedEx man drops off a package. When people meet my adult children, they never get told that homeschooling won’t work because they aren’t socialized.

While I don’t hear certain things or get the traditional questions anymore, there is a more genuine dialog that transpires about homeschooling. Granted, teaching your own children is more mainstream than it was years ago. However, I do believe that people are more willing to have an open conversation with someone who is a seasoned veteran of homeschooling when they see the outcome. (If the electrician’s house has no working lights, you are less likely to call him to your house).

WHAT TYPES OF HOMESCHOOLING QUESTIONS DO I GET ASKED NOW?

Why did you decide to homeschool?

What made you think you could homeschool?

You live in a good school district. Why didn’t you send your children to school there?

Don’t you get tired of having kids around all the time?

Statements I hear all the time about my children:

You have raised such great young adults.

Your daughter is an absolute delight.

You must be so proud of your son/daughter.

Your son works so hard.

I wish I would have homeschooled. Maybe my son/daughter wouldn’t have gotten in with the wrong crowd.

HOWEVER, THE REASONS PEOPLE GIVE ME FOR NOT HOMESCHOOLING HAVE NOT CHANGED:

I am not patient enough. Believe me, I was not at all patient when I started this journey.

I am not smart enough. Are you smart enough to read a teacher’s manual? Are you smart enough to add 1+1. You don’t need algebra when they are in first grade. Are you smart enough to admit you need help if you can’t figure something out?

I could never teach {insert subject here}. Do you know how smart your child’s teacher is? Do you know what grades they received in school in the subject they are teaching your child? I have seen some tests put out by teachers that would make you wonder if they did graduate at all.

We need two incomes. There are ways to make money from home. There are also ways to reduce your expenses to allow you to homeschool. 

More Reasons:

My child won’t listen to me. If this is your reason for not homeschooling, you really need to get control of your household. If they won’t listen to you, what makes you think they will listen to a teacher? Additionally, if they won’t listen to you when they are 10, you will have a heck of a time trying to get them to listen at 16.

I am not organized enough. I have seen families homeschool that were super organized and families that households were not organized at all. All the children came out great!

I can’t provide them with the same opportunities they will get in school. Schools cannot provide the same opportunities to your children that you can. My children have traveled, helped to care for their grandfather when he was sick, studied photography, goat anatomy and physiology, had an in-depth study of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, skinned a raccoon and made a quiver out of the skin, made a chain maille suit of armor, and studied Japanese culture. These are opportunities they may not have had in a school setting, but more importantly, they got to develop interests centered around their passions.

I don’t want my kids to be weird. Thank you for that comment. It really says a lot about what you think about my children.

YES, YOU CAN HOMESCHOOL:

While the reasons people have given for not homeschooling haven’t changed through the years, my response has. I can say confidently that homeschooling was the single best decision we made for our children.

In fact, I am so positive that homeschooling will work for your family. That is why I write. I would love to encourage you and give you the confidence necessary to homeschool your children.

If you have any homeschooling questions, I will be happy to answer them in upcoming posts. If you have any questions you would like me to address please leave me a comment below!

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