THINGS THAT TRIGGER AUTISM MELTDOWNS

When you ask families dealing with autism what the worst part is, each and everyone will say something different. Because autism is so different for each child and for each family. Jack-Jack has come so far. We have accomplished so much, but the reality is that we have SO far to go. I tend to focus on the joyful experiences and tell you about Jack-Jack’s accomplishments, but I sometimes need to tell you about our setbacks and the areas where we are not thriving. Because if you only heard the good, rather than be an encouragement, that could be depressing too. If I only tell you the good, you may get a false sense of what life is really like. So today, I will share some of the things that trigger meltdowns with Jack-Jack, and some of our struggles with autism.

SOME OF THE THINGS THAT TRIGGER A MELTDOWN FOR JACK-JACK

Animal Trigger:

Jack-Jack has a deep fear of dogs and cats and most smaller animals. He will walk right up to a cow or horse, but a dog strikes terror in his heart. He cannot tell us why he is fearful of dogs, but when one comes running, he still screams and runs away. If you know anything about dogs, screaming and running away is the absolutely worst thing you can do.

This is an area we have not even begun to tackle. We rarely encounter dogs in situations we cannot handle. But this is definitely something we need to work on in the future. However, because we know that it will be traumatic for him, we have decided to wait until we deal with a few other issues.

Food Triggers:

While Jack-Jack likes many sources of protein including almost all meats and nuts such as almonds and pistachios, he doesn’t enjoy sauces, seasoning outside of salt and pepper, or pasta. He used to love pizza, but he doesn’t any longer.

If you have a child who struggles with food and you search the internet, you will find hundreds of different suggestions. But trying hundreds of different ways to get your child to eat will most likely result in frustration and a power struggle. Even neurotypical children who are picky eaters will use food as a control. If you are too controlling about what they eat, they will most likely eat less. If you are too permissive and allow them to eat whatever they want they may only want junk food.

So what is the balance with food struggles?

Here are my tips:

1. Make sure your children see you eat different types of food. If you are a picky eater, chances are they will be a picky eater.
2. Quit listening to the people who say, “My kids ate anything I put before them.” They obviously didn’t have a picky eater.
3. My rule was: one bite – you don’t have to swallow – if you don’t like it, spit it discreetly in a napkin. This didn’t always execute the way I thought, but I have used it with all of my children. Jack-Jack didn’t have to follow this rule until the last couple of years, and he is now 14, but my other children started much younger.
4. Be a food detective: Have taste-testing parties. Start simply with potato chips or something you know your child will like. Taste 4 or 5 brands of chip or dip. Let everyone vote for their favorite. Try 4-5 different varieties of apples, peaches or pears. This dislike of certain foods could be because of texture. Trying varieties helps to see if they like crunchy apples more than they like a mushier variety.
5. Determine how you will approach things before dining out or eating at someone else’s house. Will you bring some crackers just in case there is really nothing your child will eat? Will you feed them beforehand?

Causes of Melt-downs:

There are many words and situations that trigger melt-downs. For a while, the meltdowns had seemed to be occurring less often, but now with the onset of puberty, Jack-Jack seems to be melting down more often.

While it seems like there are more meltdowns, it probably is less, but he is more vocal about how he feels. And there are many words that irritate and trigger him. When he hears someone say a particular word/words he says people have yelled at him when that isn’t what actually happened. This stage has lasted way too long and is really annoying. We all feel like we are walking on eggshells, just one moment away from a meltdown. He senses those annoyances and it bothers him even more. I guess the best way to deal with this is to ignore some of it and give him more attention when he is doing something fantastic.

Dealing with Meltdowns:

While it is sometimes impossible to remove every trigger that might cause a meltdown in your child, there are steps to help deal with them more effectively. And just like everything else with autism, there is not a one size fits all solution to coping with your autistic child, but you can try to de-escalate them when they happen.

Thank you for allowing us to share with you a glimpse of our lives. I hope you will comment below and let us know some of the struggles and trigger moments in your life!